You have Ass Fat!!

Why do women like to talk about each other's ass? Sometimes it can be really mean. There is this woman who talks constantly about other women's butt's saying how big, how wide and how saggy they are. Well, this year she has a lot of ass fat. I was told recently that this person's ass has grown very wide and that it now sags. I just laughed cause I don't care about ass fat you know. Funny how Karma has a role in life. The woman who is obsessed with how butts look has a really bad body odor problem. If you are standing next to me and I can smell you and my nose twitches and I start gagging well, there is a problem. She stood next to me at a function and I walked away cause my eyes started watering. Just imagine cigarette smell, with smelly armpit, ass crack and a touch of cheap perfume. Ughh. My stomach is turning right now from remembering it.
Recently a friend of mine said something about my ass. My reply was this: At least I have an ass. God put your ass fat in the front instead of the back. Your ass is flat with 2 legs.!! She laughed so hard she was crying!!!
And ass fat sounds a lot better than fat ass!!

Wrong Words

Today's newspaper read that there are 12 survivors of the mining blast in Virginia. WRONG..TOTALLY WRONG. Only one survivor. This is what happens when some idiot doesn't get their facts right or they just assume. Anyway it was very horrible for those families to believe that their love ones were still alive. I can't imagine their pain. Three hours after the "good" news they were told the truth.
When I was a child I was told once that a family member was dying and only had a few minutes to live. So I was already mourning this person when 2 hours later I was told that he only had a broken leg and he wasn't dying. I was so mad and relieved at the same time. I wanted to hurt someone. I was pissed. The person who gave this news was put to shame!!
Then in high school a close friend of mine told me she had leukemia and a few months to live. I was devastated right then and there and started crying. After I got my composure, she told me she was lying and just wanted to see my reaction. She told me she felt bad but I didn't so I slapped and scratched her and called her every name in the book. That changed the friendship for me. It was over. You don't screw around with people's emotions. I do believe in karma and usually paybacks are hell!!!

Pinche People

Why in the hell do people go to a movie and make a shit load of comments during the movie? Earlier I went with friends to see the Memoirs of a Geisha. It was good but a bit to long for me (2hours30mins). The auditorium was full so we sat or actually I had to sit by a couple. She coughed without covering her mouth while he burped loudly. Then he did the sound like he was going to hark up a luggie but he swallowed. Gross!! Then the non-stop comments started. What made it worse is that the husband kept saying huh..huh since the dumbass couldn't hear what the wife was saying!! I then said..Gosh..Hush!! Silence followed for 15 minutes then again the yapping started again. So the person behind me hushed them too and loudly. Then the silence lasted for another 20 minutes. It was hopeless. After the movie my friends were cracking up at me cause they know I was very irritated about this. I hardly go to the movies cause of dumb ass people like this. Or the ones that fucking have the whole theater to themselves and decide to sit right next to you. Or the one who has body order. Perhaps they didn't wipe their shit from their ass. Or the ones who breath loudly, you know that irritating loud breathing through there open mouths. Kind of a Darth Vader sound. Assholes!!